Shadowlands

I came across a facebook posting this morning which intrigued me.  It was promoting a book written by a young adult autistic male about living in two worlds, the second one being make believe.  It is something I have yet to research but something I possibly well should given my daughter's tendency to drift between our world and the one we call her shadow world. Just last night she was using an event in her shadow world to argue the case for not going to bed.

Nine times out of ten, I don't have any cause for complaint about her alternative reality.  She can spend many happy hours with her shadow family which she has created.  In this world, she is the nurturing mother figure in charge of a growing number of orphan shadow children which appear to be "misfits" as defined by normal conventional society.  They all have names and very distinctive personalities and it is fascinating to watch her have multiple conversations with them when in the real world you often have the feeling you are talking to a brick wall when trying to engage her in a simple one on one conversation.

And on the whole, we have successfully established the necessary ground rules.  The shadows go to their own shadow school to avoid any classroom/playground issues and also have their own means of transport.  This last rule was established after I was forced to stop the car during a meltdown and then turn back to the last destination to fetch one after inadvertently leaving her behind at the local shopping mall.

I have also found that by quietly listening in on her conversations with her shadows I can gain some insight into what is actually going on her brain and on a number of occasions have been quietly thrilled to find that she has actually absorbed far more than what I would have initially given her credit for.

However every so often she struggles to tell the difference between the real world and her shadow world and can't make the distinction between the two.   Events in shadowland can spill over into this world and she can't appear to see that they are not "real".  A death or departure of a shadow family member can be devastating for her with real heartfelt emotions occurring for a number of hours even though the event itself was her own creation and obviously not real.  Her shadow family is also used to take the blame for incidences that occur in the real world i.e. it was a particular shadow family member that was responsible for over flowing the bath yet again etc and she will swear black and blue that was the case.

So I guess I was relieved to find that this make believe world is not in fact uncommon among autistic children and is in fact used as a coping mechanism.  I also know which book I need to read next.